Customizer III - Revenge of the Customizer

I have referred to my customizer a few times on this blog. The first time was when he brought his formidable skills to bear in updating my sunglasses until they were truly cutting edge technology. The second time the customizer worked on my glasses, however, his genius was beyond my grasp and the work he did finished my glasses off entirely, which contributed to me looking silly in public. Believe me, I need no assistance with that kind of thing. It was at that point that I determined, with a heavy heart, that he had gone somewhat mad and I could no longer allow him to work on any of my gear. Months passed in relative peace as the customizer grew more mature. His experiments on household objects came to a near stop.

Recently, however, the tables were turned. My friend had become unkempt and out of control in the grooming department. Drastic action was required and I ended up customizing him. The results were dramatic and his revenge was swift. But enough words. To the Pictures!

Because I am nothing if not a sensitive and considerate person, I immediately starting calling him "Dobby" because, well, he kind of looked like him...

But Dobby the Customizer wasn't going to take this lying down. Oh no. I left a big bag of kitchen garbage within reach (I couldn't have been gone for more than five minutes, I swear) and he customized that thing into oblivion:

That bag of garbage started out on this side of that gate. After some angry yelling, a little deep breathing and a slow count to ten, I cleaned up the mess while the customizer spent a little time outside. Even when he displays his mad proclivities, it is difficult to stay angry with this guy for long. Which is why there is already a sequel to "Customizer III - Revenge of the Customizer"...

Thanks for swinging by. Yer Pal,

R A N T W I C K

Cycling Eyewear - Finding The Perfect Glasses

If you ride a bike much at any speed, you quickly come to realize that some sort of glasses are necessary to keep the wind and bugs out of your eyes. In sub-zero temps, it becomes even more important, since you can really hurt your eyes with cold wind.

Just like bicycles, cycling glasses can cost just about as much as you are willing to spend.

The sunglasses shown above have some pretty impressive copy written for them, describing sunglass technology I didn't even know existed!

I am pretty rough on my sunglasses, so I have never had expensive ones like the ones pictured above. I bought a pair of knockoff $25 sunglasses at the drugstore about two years ago, and miraculously, I'm still wearing them as my summer glasses. The lenses are scratched and marked up, but I stay with them because of some customizations on them that I won't be able to find anywhere else.

My glasses originally had rubber nose rests that would slide a little sometimes. The earpieces and their rubber inserts never quite hugged just right either, and the glasses were a little heavy overall. Thanks to my customizer, however, my glasses have been perfect for the last month or so. Let me show you what he did:

By removing the rubber nose rests, he created micro sub-dermal insertion retaining posts. Just a gentle press, and those suckers stay put! No slip, no slide! He is a genius. Check this out:

The nano-abrasions act like tiny hooks that grab my skin and hair, and the wing ends have been reshaped to properly contact my asymmetrical and cauliflowered ears, minimizing slip and vibration! You can't get attention to detail like that off the shelf for any price. The removal of the soft rubber inserts allows the nano-abrasions to grasp on both the outer and inner surfaces of the ring, and shaves precious grams from the whole package. I am a very lucky fellow to have found my velo-optics customizer. Take a bow, super genius with the master craftsman's touch!

And to think you accomplished such fine high-end work using only your teeth! You are amazing, you sweet little bugger!

Hey, sorry I yanked your chain. Yer Pal,

R A N T W I C K

P.S. - I really do still wear those glasses.