Am I Crazy?

I have long professed my predilection for being a solo rider, an intentional loner, if you will. I'm not really into a bike club or lbs social scene... I value the solitude offered by the bicycle very highly: it is my zen time, not to be impinged upon by the ramblings (or space taking uppings) of others. I find it calming even when riding in full downtown street mode.

 

Here in London Ontario a local cycling advocacy group has gotten some press and God help me, I've asked to be involved. Here's the email I sent:

 

Hello,

 

I am year-round bicycle commuter here in London who up until now has had no involvement in cycling advocacy. Your recent media attention has peaked my interest in your group and made me think about joining in the discussion.

 

I would like to know more about your group, and may be in a position to forward the cause (in a small way) online.

 

Thanks,

 

Patrick "Rantwick" Cormier

 

This isn't like me at all. If they get back to me, I'll have to, like, meet some new people! What have I done? Plus, in pasting my email, I have noticed a grammatical error! "I am year-round bicycle commuter"? They're bound to hate me from the start!

 

Seriously though, this is different from participating in group rides and stuff like that... unless they're into CM and shit, which I have no interest in. I think it likely that if they get back to me, they won't force me to ride with others.

 

As much as I want to just ride my bike, I'm feeling like I want to add my voice (and opinions) to the discussions of what London needs to promote cycling. I have read some stuff that makes this group seem like typical bike lane proponents; that isn't bad so long as it's not all about the paint. Even if it is, maybe I can add a voice that helps reduce poorly planned paint! I love bike lanes, really, when they make sense and are safely designed.

 

Caring about stuff sucks. I mean, when you start caring about stuff, it makes you start doing stuff. This is bad news for a person who is lazy by nature. Damn. Am I crazy?

 

Yer Doomed to Do More Stuff Pal,

R A N T W I C K

PS - Under my new rules, "uppings" (see first para) is a real word.

Are You #%^&1n' Kiddin' Me #3

There's an ad that has been running for a while that drives me insane every time I see it. I suppose everybody wants to feel young, or at least younger. But this?

Come on! I guess I could handle some sort of other condiment, say, salsa or something, being characterized as edgy. This, however, is Miracle Whip. Saying that Miracle Whip is cooler or more hip than almost anything else on the planet, including mayo, is the stupidest idea I've seen in a long long time.

Normally I would drift off into a tangential discussion of some kind, but this ad leaves me feeling so crusty I'm just gonna leave it there. Sandwich spreads are not people, nor are they loud, or hard core. I mean, really... Are You #%^&1n' Kiddin' Me?

Spread the Love,

R A N T W I C K

PS - Always late to the party, I now realize that many others, some with actual audiences, have already made fun of these commercials. It would seem I am completely lacking in tangy zip, because I posted this anyway. Oh, one more thing: who the hell uses polaroid cameras any more? Where does she buy film? Don't all cool young people own iphones? And where are the fixies? Don't ad executives know what's hip? Man, I really am clueless.