Rantwick, now with Style!

When you read articles on starting any type of cycling, many of them seem to include a great many "must haves" like special clothing, gloves, shoes and so on. Now everybody knows (or should know) that all you really need is a bicycle in good working order and clothes in which you won't freeze or overheat. As people become more advanced cyclists and ride farther and faster and exert themselves more, some bike-specific clothing becomes more important or convenient. I don't want to advise anybody on what they should wear beyond the fact that it shouldn't be capable of getting caught up in your bike or obstruct your vision.

When anyone rides enough that their clothes start to cause discomfort, I'm guessing they'll look into alternatives for themselves. Practical matters like comfort, however, aren't the whole story. For some, cycling is an opportunity to show some Style. I've begun wondering what it would be like to have Style, since I haven't ever had the inclination. Maybe it feels fantastic! Not having the money to buy a bunch of different cycling getups, I thought that through the wonders of photoshop I could try out virtual Style to see if I would like it. So, without further delay:

Although the "townie" bike appeals to me in that it has full fenders, the requisite little dogs pose a problem, as do red pants. You see, I'm allergic to dog dander, and I'm guessing riding along creating a breeze would turn those nice little dogs into mobile dander dispensers. That same breeze may well blow their black fur onto my red pants, and I'm sorry, but that simply wouldn't do. Maybe something similar, but more traditonal...

Again, lovin' the fenders. Socks that look much like cable-knit sweaters and a hat that would definitely blow off my head at the crazy speeds at which I ride, however, make this look a no-go. Speaking of speed, maybe I should go full roadie skin suit...

I must confess, I love the way this suit compliments my skin tones... Mmmm. Sadly, sporting a suit like this would just make my beautiful commuter look infinitely stupid, instead of annoyingly geeky and practical. You know, maybe I should just try to show a little more flair!

Not having ever applied makeup, it made me squint like that, sorry. Overall, though, if I'm going to dress to look good rather than to ride, this one appeals to me more than the others. Does that mean I secretly wish to be a fashionable, bike riding woman? Of course not! Shame on you for thinking it... I am as athletic and manly as they come, I'll have you know.

Virtual Style didn't really end up doing much for me. Ah well, nothing was ventured, and so, I suppose, nothing was gained. I'm dreadfully sorry to have wasted your time... I shall endeavour to do much better in future.

Until Then, Wear What You Want. I Do...

Yer Pal,

R A N T W I C K

I Am Awful

The Rev. Michael C. Kelly, March 2007

Remember that patent that I found so interesting and poked fun at? I received a comment recently from somebody who knew the inventor. The commenter informed me that the inventor had passed away just over a week before I posted that blog entry:

Anonymous said...
I found your blog entry doing a Google search for the patent you've written about. I am sorry to say that although I could have easily put you in touch with the inventor, he is very much missed as he died in an accident last December. As far as I know, the system isn't for sale (though I know he auctioned some for charities) and I don't know what will happen to his dreams of encouraging kids to have more fun outside. But if you want to know more about him, try this link: http://www.loudountimes.com/news/2009/jan/02/Purcellville-pastor-kelly-obituary/

Of course, I followed the link and learned what you may have learned already. The author of that patent was a well-loved parish priest in Purcellville, Virginia, who died young (at 53), helping others to the very last. I, as you may have guessed, felt pretty bad. I mean, I had been mocking, if gently, a recently deceased Priest... I replied to the commenter, who responded with what I think was a lot of class and kindness:

Rantwick said...
Anonymous,Thank you very much for posting your comment. I followed the link and Father Kelly sounds like he was an outstanding Pastor and person. I feel a little guilty having poked fun at his patent idea, and can only hope that his sense of humour would have extended to me as well.

Coley said...
(ex-Anonymous) Don't feel bad, when he first told me about his bicycle airplanes I thought he was quite nuts. He did have a great sense of humor and I'm sure he would have supplied you with a witty comeback or some quote from history. :)

I would like to extend my sincere, if late in coming, condolences to everyone who loved Father Kelly, and encourage my readers (both of you) to follow that link and learn about somebody who was certainly much more than an inventor.

Yer Pal,

R A N T W I C K